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 Two Scoops: February 25, 2008 columns
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Logo
Up from the grave he arose…
For the Week of February 25, 2008
I love the Great Undead of Soaps. Once upon a time, I saw Robert and Anna explode on a ship, and then a decade or so later, they showed up at Robin's with some lame explanation about jumping ship before the explosion.
I love the Great Undead of Soaps. Once upon a time, I saw Robert and Anna explode on a ship, and then a decade or so later, they showed up at Robin's with some lame explanation about jumping ship before the explosion. The rule used to be quite clear; if you don't actually see a body, they aren't dead.

I saw Diego Alcazar die, and this time, I saw his lifeless body on the docks after a gunshot. But, I guess he was only mostly dead. You, my brilliant readers, figured this out long before I did this time. A few of you wrote this week to tell me you guessed Diego would be the killer. I almost said "He can't be, he's DEAD." But then I remembered this was General Hospital and dead people don't really stay dead for very long.

For those of you coming to the party late, Diego has reason to dislike all of his intended victims. Alexis killed his Uncle Luis. Carly married then dumped his Dad, Lorenzo. Georgie and Maxie were mean to his cousin Sage, not to mention that he had a crush on Georgie, but she never quite got over Dillon. Emily was the intended victim for a murder that accidentally got Sage killed instead in a case of mistaken identity. Another unsolved mystery is why Diego, who never met Sage, felt the need to avenge her death…I don't know what he had against poor Leticia, other than her relationship to Carly and Sonny. Sam, of course, is the one who shot and killed him. Or so we thought until Friday…

And now, he has Sam trapped alone in her apartment. This is her own fault, as Alexis begged her to come home with her, and Lucky stopped by to check on her, and she casually dismissed them both and said she was fine alone. She was very, very wrong. If I had nearly been killed by a serial killer and then run over by a car, you can bet your butt I would be at my Mama's house and not home alone. But hey, that's just me.

In the meantime, half of Port Charles is hovering around Logan's hospital bed thinking he's the murderous culprit. Again, this is his own fault, because he got a bunch of murderer paraphernalia strewn about his house. They must have a Mob Toys R Us in Port Charles where these tools of the trade can easily be purchased.

Logan's big plan to frame Johnny as the killer didn't work, and most likely much blew his last chances with Lulu, I'd guess. It was a pathetic and sick thing to do, but I really understand the impulse.

You've heard me mention my BFF Betsy - the reason we became BFF's is that back in the day we were both dating the same creep and found out he had been lying to us both. We went from being rivals to pals so we could team up to do bad things to him like sign him up for 50 magazine subscriptions and call an Army Recruiter and say he wanted to enlist. Nothing harmful, just stuff we knew would irritate him. Of course, this was the 80's when such things were considered pranks and not crimes. We were teenagers at the time, and thus, very immature.

Logan went beyond immature pranks and was going for the jugular, trying to get Johnny out of the way permanently to clear his path to Lulu. Instead, he got kinked in the head and suspected of being a serial killer. Maxie believes Logan is guilty and had the life support plug in her hand ready to yank it out, but the voices in her head that sound like Coop told her not to. Lulu has her doubts; she isn't ready to believe he could be a killer. On the flip side, she and Johnny made love, so she's a bit preoccupied right now. Logan's own Dad Scott Baldwin has considered the possibility that Logan is the killer, but is sitting at his bedside hoping there's some reasonable explanation.

There is not a reasonable explanation of course, just goofy soap explanations, like Diego's back from the dead, and Logan just happened to have a ski mask and strangling cord on his coffee table by coincidence. But we love our Soapy Sudsy Silly Storylines, and this one is no exception. Diego is a perfect culprit. I admit I did not see this one coming. Perhaps if Diego is alive, Lorenzo is, too - and that would be delightful because Ted King is my favorite literate mobster.

'Mini Me' Mobster Michael is hiding out under a box on some cargo ship that is heading heaven knows where… He's scared and shivering with trembling bloody hands trying to remain unseen by the scary dockworkers stepping over him every twelve seconds. He called his Mommy but chickened out and didn't speak up when she said 'Hello'. Sonny's warning about what would happen to him if he ever got caught with a gun is playing over and over in his head on some sad little loop. Carly's joy about her new baby was short lived as she had to stop daydreaming about hers and Jax's bundle of joy to worry and fret about her missing first born son.

Sonny is certain that one of the Zacharra's shot Kate, and I can only imagine how he will react when he discovers it is Michael's gun that shot his beloved. I have to wonder if Sonny is off his meds, he's been acting somewhat erratic lately. Sure, he loves Kate and is sorry she got hurt, but he just wants to shoot first ask questions later even knowing that could ignite a mob war and endanger his entire family. He's accused Johnny, Trevor and the red-shoed multi-faceted Claudia. Sonny is certain a member of the Zacharra family had Kate shot, but can't pinpoint which one he wants to shoot first.

Jason isn't focused right now either, he's so busy trying to prove Liz isn't guilty of Sam's hit and run that he can't think of much else. Tracy and Luke uncovered some evidence that points to Monica as the guilty party, but the writers have lead us down the wrong path before. Monica "donated" some clothes to charity that just happened to be blood stained boozy smelling clothes with a flask in the pocket. I can't believe she tossed out a perfectly good flask.

Ric is trying very hard to walk on the right path, and has helped ZzzzzMariana escape an abusive relationship. Ric asks Elizabeth to give her some medical attention and Liz got all judgmental and assumed Ric is the one who abused her. Ric tried to explain and wanted Liz to know he is trying to change for the better. He believes he has found a second chance at getting it right in Marianna, but Liz won't accept his words. And really, I guess if my husband had been holding a woman hostage for months in our spare room and I found out about it, I wouldn't think very nice thoughts about him ever again either.

Nikolas is trying to get Ghost Emily to tell him who killed her, but his cousin Sam could give him the answers he seeks without supernatural intervention or brain tumor related hallucinations if she makes it out of her place alive. She is the host of 'Everyday Heroes' so it would really ruin her ratings if she didn't escape.

What will happen tomorrow dear readers? Will Kristina not tell anyone she wants lunch? Will Stefan Cassadine come back from the dead and admit he ran over Sam? Will Kristina not tell anyone she has homework? Will Bennie come back from the dead and ask Bernie for his accounting job back? Will Kristina not tell anyone she needs cupcakes for Girl Scouts? Will AJ Quartermaine come back from the dead and split a flask with Monica? Will Kristina not tell anyone she thinks Molly needs her diaper changed? Will Rick Weber come back from the dead and convince Laura to emerge from her vegetative state as he's still alive? Will Kristina not tell anyone Daddy's new girlfriend is an illegal?

Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of soapcentral.com or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen, what has happened, and to take a look at the logistics of it all. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same view point.
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