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 Two Scoops: March 12, 2007 columns
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Bangs and spikes
For the Week of March 12, 2007
A good hair day cannot be trivialized. Robin Scorpio (a.k.a Kimberly McCullough) looks extremely cute with bangs.
A good hair day cannot be trivialized. Robin Scorpio (a.k.a Kimberly McCullough) looks extremely cute with bangs. While this was not the most important thing that happened this week, I wanted to make sure I mentioned it because getting a good haircut is a happy moment in a woman's life, and you really want people to notice. When I like my hair, I like myself and the whole world. When I hate my hair, it would take a winning lotto ticket or front row seats to a Prince concert, or hearing there's a pill that makes you magically lose 50 pounds overnight to cheer me up. Robin will have no problem keeping Patrick attention when she has such a groovy 'do.

Now, an 8th grade math problem. New dude named Logan shows up in town. Says he heard his father is in Port Charles and he is trying to track him down. He has piercing eyes, major attitude and blonde spiky hair. He hits on Luke Spencer's daughter Lulu and she rebuffs him. (Just what The Blonde One needs, another suitor…) When Logan meets Scott Baldwin, presumably for the first time- a total stranger, he makes a point of getting in his face. Anyone else adding things up the same way I am? My math says all this adds up to Scott having some long lost son. Imagine If Lulu falls for Scott's son - Luke and Scott can fight into the next decade! They can crack each other in the head with walkers, or slip Ex-Lax into one another's chili at Kelly's. And the back of Laura's head will just keep rocking.

Back to Logan; Logan happens to know '3', a.k.a. Cooper Barrett, new employee of the Metro Court. Wouldn't you think that after Jax's hotel was just taken at gunpoint, embroiled in a hostage situation, and blown up by bombs that he would check the references of people he hires instead of just taking Maxie's word it? "Um yes, I am a compulsive liar and faked a pregnancy to trap a married man, but this time I'm telling the truth. No really!" The world is jumpy - a couple of terrorists try to smuggle some explosives on a plane in a bottle, and now none of us can take our favorite shampoo to Grandma's house and have to use her White Rain or worse, the Aqua Net hairspray she bought back in 1967. Jax should be jumpy, too. My church does background checks on people who want to help kids paste cotton ball lambs to their Easter papers in Sunday School, so why wouldn't Mega Millionaire and International Business Savvy Jax look into references?

Come to think of it, he would have to fire his whole staff, Sam was a con artist and thief, Max was a mini mobster, Maxie was peddling drugs - so I guess 3 fits into the mix after all. Even so, I would have checked his references.

But that's just me, I am a nerd and Google everything. If I had been Carly, I would have Googled "Dominican Republic Divorce Laws" before flying down there, too. Sure, she's been divorced there before, but that was years ago and things change. Some countries that were countries 10 years ago don't even exist anymore, much less have the exact same laws on the books. For your edification, I happened to Google it myself, and learned a few interesting tidbits. Not only can Sonny contest the divorce, but after it's final, it says the divorcing female can't legally remarry for 10 months. I hope Jax knows another 3rd world country that trumps the Dominican Republic, or these two will be getting married after Michael graduates at the rate they're going now.

But in Port Charles, time has no meaning. Even after you die you can come back and torment the living. Ghost Alan seems much happier than Live Alan, and the best part must be having the upper hand with Tracy, being able to pop in and out as you see fit. She brought the haunting on herself by having Luke forge Alan's will so she would end up with his ELQ shares while cheating the other Q's out of their fare share. Of course they were wise to her game, but Alan's lawyer is convinced that has to be the original will as he can't imagine anyone being able to break in to his safe to tamper with it. I guess he has never encountered Dr. Von Schemerman, or whatever fake name Luke is using these days. And he looked darned good in that suit, ay?

Of course the only reason we got to the reading of Alan's will so quickly is that we were totally and utterly robbed of a proper sendoff at Alan's memorial service. The entire episode consisted of people filtering in and bickering over who could and couldn't attend. When everyone was finally seated, and Ned got up to tale the podium, I settled in with my Kleenex ready for a good cry. He said a few lines, and then they cut to commercial. After the commercial…empty seats. Are you frigging kidding me? Ned was the only person who got to speak at Alan's service? We didn't get to see it? The only saving grace of this episode was the montage of clips at the end, which was wonderful, but far too short. I felt after 30 years, Alan Q deserved more than one speaker at his service.

Dear readers, sometimes you agree with me, and sometimes you don't. Boy, did I hit a nerve last week! Many of you were astonished that I said I understood Ric. Allow me to explain. I was not saying I think Ric has changed into a good guy. I was not saying Alexis should lose her daughter. I was not criticizing anyone using medical marijuana, I happen to live in a state where it's legal and I'm happy for anyone who needs it. I was not saying I had forgotten every wicked thing Ric had ever done. What I was saying, and will say again - I don't think Ric had an agenda. He may have started out with one - he may have just wanted to stick it to Alexis back at the start, but I think in the moment I mentioned last week, he was just a Dad worried about his baby. Isn't it possible for a person, no matter how imperfect they are, to still have something good and pure and decent in them? I think there is - we have many 3 dimensional people on GH - why can't Ric be one of them? Jason is a hit man, he kills people for a loving, and yet we all think he's a great guy, because, his work aside, he is loving and loyal and decent. Ric, on the other hand, has a respectable job but uses it to manipulate situations, and has done some truly awful things. But I think the guy truly loves his daughter. That's all I was trying to say. I could empathize with his concerns about his daughter's care.

As to Alexis's other daughter Sam, apparently some news lady named Amelia stole her watch or something. I can't quite figure out this whole storyline with Sam yet, I only hope it doesn't have anything to do with a twin who's a ballroom dancer or a deck of moldy old playing cards.

What will happen tomorrow, dear readers? Will Spinelli take his hat off now that Spring is approaching? Will Alice do the same things I would and quit her job now that she has come into 75K? Will Carly get Michael to teach her Eenie Meanie Miney Moe so she can finally pick a man? Will seeing Alan's ghost make Tracy fess up? Will Bobbie get a love life now that Scott is back in town? Will the GH staff teach other hospitals how to do brain surgery without having to shave the person's hair like they did for Lorenzo? Will the new, hot, intellectual, Stan stick around long enough for us to become completely smitten with him, or will he vanish in two weeks?

Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of soapcentral.com or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen, what has happened, and to take a look at the logistics of it all. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same view point.
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