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The mystery of the vanishing doctors
For the Week of October 25, 2004
Sounds like a Scooby Doo plot, doesn't it? But really, where IS the staff of General Hospital?
Sounds like a Scooby Doo plot, doesn't it? But really, where IS the staff of General Hospital? I have to ask as it seems whole floors of the hospital are vacant. Maniacs like Helena can go to a hospital chapel and pull a knife on someone, march them all the way down the hall to an elevator, and never pass another soul. I'm confused, shouldn't there be people there? I was prompted to ask this from personal experience. Last week my beloved friend David was in the hospital (Don't ever scare me like that again, David!) and I went to visit him and found the hospital bustling with activity and swarming with people. In fact, I didn't take a single step in any part of the hospital where another human being was not present. There was a book fair in the lobby. The elevators were packed full. The hallways had both staff members and hospital staff meandering around, and every room had people in it. (His room had a crabby 94 year old roommate who yelled things at the staff like "What is this CRAP you brought me to eat? I HATE Jell-O!") It was not a quiet place, nor a place where an armed madwoman could have had a chokehold on someone with a knife to their throat and made it to the end of the hallway. Why if Ric hadn't stepped off the elevator, Alexis would be dead and no one would even know what happened to her as it seems no one came to work at GH that day.

In the old days on GH - there were actually background nurses and doctors wandering around. This week I saw Steven Weber, Liz and Bobbie at the hospital. What happened to all the candy stripers - is Maxie locked in a hospital broom closet or something? Did Mac give Georgie permission to quit? No, wait, now I remember, when Liz started nursing school, she took over the cart pushing and probably put the candy stripers out of business. Anyway, the empty hospital where numerous crimes can be committed is beyond the "suspension of disbelief" - it's insulting our intelligence.

Another point of interest to me is the matter of faith. Jesus forgives all of our sins, and Sonny really depends on that. Mind you, he doesn't have enough respect for Jesus to stop killing people, but at least he does turn to Him in prayer. I can't decide is it more interesting that the most religious person in Port Charles is a criminal or that no Priests, Rabbis, or Ministers, etc. are ever anywhere in Port Charles but officiating Weddings and Funerals? My Dad was a minister. I work in a very large church. I can tell you that ministers do a lot more than weddings and funerals. When people in the congregation have sick babies in the hospital, the pastors go and hold the hands of the parent and pray for the baby to get well. When couples have marital woes, the pastors counsel with them to try to resolve their differences. When a member of a family dies, the Pastors stop by and make sure the widow is alright financially, emotionally, and physically and encourage them to go to grief support meetings to work through their pain. When someone is hooked on drugs, or booze, or gambling or sex, Pastors give counsel and advice and try to get people hooked up with 12-Step groups to help them battle their addictions. And that's a very short list, of course. So why is it that in Port Charles, there are no ministers ever anywhere? Why is it when Sonny has a sick kid in the hospital the priest at Queen of Angels (or whatever it's called) isn't down there with Sonny and Carly with a hand around their shoulders? Didn't Sonny donate a gazillion dollars to that church? Is the priest so busy he couldn't take 15 minutes to stop by the hospital when Morgan was sick?

But that's just a personal tangent, of course. The real issue at hand is that Sonny was there to pray about the horror of lying to his child about what he does for a living. This amuses me. I had a big debate last week with someone over Fahrenheit 9/11. The issue at hand is quite similar... I was watching the DVD with someone who hopped up and left the room when the images of dead Iraqi children came onto the screen. He was outraged that Michael Moore had shown such vivid and graphic images. I said "So it's worse that a filmmaker SHOWED the dead babies, than that there ARE dead babies?" And that's my question to Sonny, too. "So Sonny, let me get this straight, you feel worse about lying to your son about killing people, than the fact that you actually KILL people?" It's warped logic; it's an eschewed view of the situation. It's not the LYING about killing that's the problem, Sonny, it's that you KILL people, and thus have to lie. And, dear readers, NO, I am not endorsing a political agenda, nor endorsing a candidate, nor revealing my party affiliation, so please, don't feel the need to chastise me.

Sonny is on the verge of having another child to warp, in fact, two. The revelation that Baby Kristina is Sonny's daughter is nearing rapidly. Unless, by some odd twist of fate, Ric has Bone Marrow that can be used to save Kristina, Sonny will have to know in order to save Kristina's life. We all knew it would come down to this, we just didn't know when. (But November Sweeps are nearing, so that's my guess.) Ric and Sonny are by no means friends, but the fact is the ice has cooled a bit and they have had a couple of civil conversations lately. I'd actually be thrilled to have those two characters explored, put in a situation where they have to work together to save Kristina, or anything that would open dialogue between them. Reluctantly or not, they are brothers.

Speaking of family ties, Carly and John have had a new lease of life via John's shooting. Carly had just finished telling John she couldn't have a relationship with him when the bullet hit and she had to reconsider. Durant cleared Jason of the crime, and we all know that he will use it later to either blackmail Sonny or Carly into something. Thing is, I think he's actually developed real feelings for her, and genuinely cares for her, but is still hell bent on sending her husband and the father of his grandchildren to prison. The scenes between the two of them were very poignant this week, Father and Daughter trying to build a bridge to one another. It made me cry-but so does everything these days- I even cried during the American League World Series play-offs as Dad wasn't around to call and talk to about it this year. But, I digress... Carly won't believe that John is using her until he does something drastic and does irreparable harm to her family. She wants so much to believe that he is on the level that even Courtney telling her he used her to blackmail Jason didn't sway her.

Message to Courtney: Get on a plane, and go get Jax. Turn the Foster Kid back in, as you haven't been home for 3 days and Mike is mean to him. Say! Here's an idea! Since you have a gazillion dollars from saving Skippy in the fire, go get a 2 bedroom apartment if you want a foster kid! Every now and then, go to your foundation office and do some work. Glad to hear you are going to stop stalking Jason and leave him to Sam.

Message to Sam: C'mon Sam, you KNOW you want Jason, so stop pretending to still be in love with Sonny. Even MICHAEL is ready to accept you now. Give Jason a reason to stay alive. Please. And thanks for fixing your hair, it looks great. (Side-Note to Wardrobe: Sam's baby looks like a basketball, way too ROUND.)

Message to Heather: Way to go Psycho Girl, you got that horny old fool to marry you!

Message to Skye: Skye, baby - you aren't as good at the whole "Dress up and play German Doctors" thing as Luke is. You're going to give him away. Go hide someplace and shut up and let Luke handle it.

Message to Faith: You're going to confess to a murder you didn't commit and trust someone lese to spring you? What, are you insane? Ah, yes. You are. Poison ring and Grandma. Liz and the lemonade. I'd almost forgotten.

Message to Lorenzo: Leave Sonny and Carly alone and focus on Lois. Every time you come up with some plot to wreck Sonny and get Carly, it turns into some Wile E. Coyote disaster. It never works. Give it up. Oh, and by the way, I think you are exceedingly hot.

Message to Nikolas: Ding Dong the Witch is dead? Don't celebrate quite yet, Nik, presumed dead Cassadine's have a way of resurrecting themselves.

What will happen tomorrow, dear readers? Will Michael congratulate Sonny on fathering some more illegitimate kids when he learns about new sister Kristina? Will AJ come back and actually be the best choice of parent? Will Brook Lynn ever record her CD or just keep meddling in her Mom's dating habits? Will Heather get pregnant with Edward's child and give Alan a little half-brother? Will there be room on Courtney's apartment if large dog Rosie ever comes home? Will we find a recording device in Morgan's stuffed bunny from Grandpa? Will skanky Lana the hit-woman be laughed out of town for missing her target and sleeping with both the intended victim and the guy who hired her? Will Sonny forgive Carly for not telling him about Kristina? (Maybe by next ratings sweep in May) Will Helena have plastic surgery after her fall and come back as Liz Taylor again?

Only tomorrow knows, dear readers, so I will tune in tomorrow as long as there are tomorrows.

Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of soapcentral.com or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen, what has happened, and to take a look at the logistics of it all. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same view point.
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