soapcentral.com panelists predict the Emmy winners: Lisa Svenson

by Dan J Kroll

Posted Sunday, June 15, 2008 5:21:37 PM

LISA SVENSON

In the much-anticipated sequel to her previous Emmy predictions, Lisa Svenson returns to predict the winners again. She has been the person-on-the-street Emmy predictor for soapcentral.com since 2001, and revels in her successful selection of seven Emmy winners (combined, since 2001). She has used a variety of methods, from reading storylines and character histories to “scientific” experiments in that time, and attributes the bulk of her “success” to sheer chance (when she picked three in 2005, she perhaps should have bought lottery tickets, too, because it was clearly a lucky year, aside from her personal life, in which luck went out the window, smashed on the pavement below, cracked open its skull, bled profusely, and suffered major head trauma).

2007 will be different, though. In 2007, Lisa will return to experimentation, and will spend hours devising and implementing tests, perhaps even endurance tests, to select who the winners might be in the various categories. She has a moderately big house (undergoing a lot of repair at a slow pace—ample places and situations to conduct experiments). She has six pets (four dogs, one cat, one betta fish named Fedora), all of whom might be willing to assist in the selection process—provided food is involved. She lives with her teenaged daughter and 99-year-old grandmother, but understands the rules that she must make her selections herself. She will also not consult with friends or family, classmates or professors, lawyers or doctors, physical therapists or pastors (most of whom will, if they know she is doing this, offer opinions and confess to watching at least one soap).

Apparently, Lisa’s failure to watch soaps throughout her life puts her in an unusual spot. Even her boyfriend has more familiarity with the soaps his mother used to watch than Lisa has. She worries sometimes that she is missing something, and yet still almost never remembers that she has a television and can turn it on. And certainly, the thought of turning it on during the daytime never crosses her mind. However, this only serves to make her predictions that much more interesting.

In the interests of scientific purity, each of the methods used is described in sufficient detail so that you, the reader, can visualize the steps Lisa took.

Without further ado, here are Lisa’s expert predictions (you’ll note that the soapcentral.com staff will refer to these as guesses, but Lisa firmly believes they are predictions, because there is a fine line between guess and prediction, particularly if it involves weather forecasts):

Previous Predictions
2007: 3 for 8