Ho-ly cow. Did you guys see that?! Did you see that completely decadent piece of theater that the soap gods sent down to us? It actually lived up to the hype from Alison Sweeney, Kate Mansi and James Scott. And even though I knew that it was a dream before I watched it (Thanks a lot, Internet!), I still thought it was pure magic. That "Keep Until I Delete" button on my DVR remote was activated, and if anyone changes that status, there will be hell to pay in my household. I'm as happy as @Tony_S_Days at a Kristen Appreciation Rally. (He throws them quarterly.)
Now, yes, there will be time to discuss the downside to using such a big fake-out. But ain't nobody got time for that in this edition of Two Scoops. The end result was so beautifully written, acted, filmed, staged, and, well, soaped that I can't do anything but praise it.
Touted as a gift for Ejami fans -- those of us weirdos who get the evil magic that makes Ejami a supercouple -- those extended scenes did not disappoint.
In E.J.'s bad dream, Sami saw the picture and went through a gamut of emotions. She thought it was a fake. She was so crushed that she couldn't even think of the word "why." She lashed out at E.J. She tore up her wedding invitations and sunk into the embarrassment of feeling an upcoming "I told you so" from each and every Brady in the land. And finally, when she ended up on the floor in E.J.'s arms, screaming, "I love you…you broke me," all I could think was, "Right back atcha, Alison."
For his part, E.J. offered up the variety of reasons -- keeping Abigail quiet about Nick, he thought that he'd lost Sami. He even brought up how insignificant this was compared to all the things they did to each other. But nothing landed with Sami.
She was still caught up on the fact that he slept with Chad's ex/their babysitter. Excuse me, I mean she was still caught up on the fact that he might have gotten Chad's ex/their babysitter pregnant. Sami didn't miss a beat, tearing into Abigail. My personal favorite part was when she accused Abigail of trying to finish the job of wrecking a Brady gal relationship, since Abigail fell just short of it with Austin and Carrie. Burrrrrrn!
It all culminated with a chase scene that could only appear in soaps -- complete with Sami flinging a "pregnant" Abigail over the railing of Alice Ever-Loving Horton's house!
It was everything that is sacred to soaps, delivered by some of the best actors we've got. And it was glorious.
But back in the real soap world, E.J. found the envelope and -- shocker of all shockers -- actually opened it and saw what was inside. E.J.'s reaction, complete with stumbling around the DiMera living room, was nothing short of great on James Scott's part. E.J. quickly realized that Stefano couldn't be behind it, since Stefano was already holding this over E.J.'s head. And there ended E.J.'s streak of smart thinking.
I guess it makes sense for him to question Abigail, especially since she's not above taking a daytrip to Crazy Town every once in a while. But Abigail has just as much to lose and E.J., and she's been pretty adamant that she's done with his taco stand, so he needed to think harder.
His next move was to question Gabi, which made perfect sense because she's definitely one that you want to rely upon for accurate information under pressure. She's, like, the best at that. But she swore that she didn't tell a single soul…except for Sonny…and Kate…and she may have tweeted it out…but other than that, nope, she was on lockdown.
I appreciate that E.J. was going about this the logical way and not wanting to rule out any of his many enemies. But I'd suggest that he might be wise to narrow his search to just the enemies that have threatened him in the last 48 hours. Because that list starts and ends with Nick Fallon. And it's a little frustrating that E.J didn't immediately consider Nick. Obviously, E.J. needs to make friends with Aiden.
Yup, I'm officially taking up donations to send Aiden a fruit basket as a thank you gift. The dude's BS-o-meter has been on point since he got to Salem! He's been right about so many things. Ciara was bullying Chase. Hope absolutely has a different set of legal standards for her friends and family. Hope could open her eyes a bit (okay, a lot) to the horror that her daughter has become. Kayla is delightful. The list could go on.
So it didn't surprise me one bit when Aiden saw that Nick was totally full of it. (See how easy that was, Gabi?) I'm not even that mad at him for drawing up an aggressive custody document. That's what lawyers are supposed to do.
I am, however, fuming once again with Gabi of Stupidsville.
First, I have no idea why Gabi is so put out that Will wants a formal custody agreement -- a standard document that most non-married parents have. I guess Gabi flips out at her car each time she has to fill up too. "Oh, you won't run without gas now, Kia? What's the matter? I thought you trusted me!"
Second, I appreciate that she says that she would never keep Will from Arianna. But it's that old saying about actions speaking louder than words. As Aiden reminded Gabi, he works for her. She could have easily told him to draw up a straight 50-50 agreement and be done with the whole thing. But she didn't. She let Nick be part of her custody agreement and melted like a Popsicle on Field Day.
Is it bad that I'm actually rooting for Nick to ruin her? Yes, it is bad. I'm a terrible person.
Moving on, Daniel had his day in hospital court in front of a very slim hospital board that did not include Julie, E.J., or Kate -- all of whom I could have sworn have been involved in board proceedings in the past. Still, I love that they didn't drag their feet on this one. Salem is much safer with Daniel back on designated life-saver duties, and we've got bigger storyline fish to fry.
I thought for sure we were in for another round of Jennifer not trusting Daniel. But just when I was ready to throw my arms up at the whole storyline, Jennifer busted out with the news that someone framed Daniel. Huzzah! She learned!!
And she wasn't the only smart cookie. It took Nicole no time to track down the ex-Mrs. Liam Psychopants and get an earful about how much Liam obsesses over blue-eyed gals with long, blonde hair. So that's why Sami went brunette!
The visit seemed to steer away from my theory that Liam is really Peter Blake. I think it's a missed opportunity, but the storyline is still on my good list because it's involving even more characters. Nicole called up her other BFF/fake baby daddy, Rafe, and asked him to do his FBI thing on Liam. And Theresa fumbled around Salem until she finally came up with a great idea as well.
It was a good move for Theresa to call home, but she spoke to the wrong person. When a crazy man is after you, you call your ISA father and get his international many of mystery self on the case! And really, when's the last time any of us thought, "Gosh, this storyline is so much better without Shane Donovan in it"? Never. No one ever thinks that. So let's make that happen, DAYS!
Finally, Anne's freak-out at the coffee station was hilarious. Sure, she was 100% wrong. She knows Daniel was drugged, so there was nothing for him to "get away" with at all. But frazzled Anne was made of win. She was one Volkswagen van away from screaming, "Argh! You darn kids ruined my master plan!" Can we keep this Anne? She makes me laugh.
I get that since Kristen isn't around, Brady takes his anger out on Eric. But, man, it breaks my heart each time Brady acts like Mr. Grumpy Rump. All poor Eric wants is a hug, man!
J.J. and Paige are a little too early in their relationship for him to be getting huffy about her going to Stanford. Also, I hate to break it to him, but since Paige also wants to be a doctor, she's going to be gone for more than four years. On the bright side, in soap time, that means she'll be back and working at Salem U Hospital in about 18 months.
I loved that Kate didn't bat an eye and played right along with E.J.'s accusations just for the sake of seeing what was in that envelope. I also adore that she didn't let a little thing like attempted mutilation stop her from accepting a gorgeous cocktail ring from Stefano. Please never change, Kate.
Abigail didn't exactly rock it in the decision-making department last week. First, it's a terrible idea for Abigail to approach Sami and actively get in her business. Second, it's definitely bad form to ask J.J. to ditch community service for a while. And, finally, that was Ben trying to ask you out, Abbers! Don't walk out on that!
But there's still hope for Abigail! I could have hugged her when she scolded Nick that Arianna's custody is none of his business. Hear, hear, Mademoiselle Deveraux!