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 Two Scoops: November 25, 2013 columns
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Revenge of the sith
For the Week of November 25, 2013
With Kristen missing in action, Salem is in the market for the next great villain to terrorize the town. Find out why Anne may actually beat out E.J., Victor, Nick, or Gabi for the title in this week's Two Scoops.
DAYS has a long, successful history of great villains. Heck, @Tony_S_Days and I did a whole Summer of Sinner blog series on the baddies of Salem. However, losing Eileen Davidson is a killer loss to DAYS because Salem sure made a lot more sense when Kristen was around.

She could be unapologetically bad with an in-your-face license for crazy, perhaps only equaled by the "late" Andre. Now that she's gone, and Stefano is on some inexplicable time-out to think about what he's done, Salem is left looking for a specific kind of villain. And if they don't find it, what type of city will Salem be A.D. -- after DiMeras? Basically, how do we go on without Kristen?

E.J. is an easy choice, since his last name basically implies that he can't give you the correct time without lying to you. But his drama with Sami, Justin, and running the company is all much more interesting than assuming Kristen's vacant evil cape.

Tony keeps telling me that Sami and E.J. are going to be fine. He's super smart about things -- like using cherry juice in cosmopolitans -- so I'm going to trust him. The fact that Sami didn't pack up and typhoon out of the mansion gave me hope. But I'm still a little suspicious, especially because the writers seem committed to giving E.J. no reason to support Kristen.

I went back and rewatched the scene where E.J. found out about the rape. His reaction was somewhere between "You're a crazy person" and "I'll cut you if this ruins things for me with Sami." I believe he even mentioned that he'd lost Sami each time he'd lied and wouldn't do it again. The take-away point being that keeping Sami happy and in his life is his A#1 priority. So what I can't figure out is why E.J. is not only not tripping over himself to tell Sami the truth, but he's now also perpetuating this lie all on his own.

For what? Family? There was a time when Stefano had John strapped to a table in the basement and E.J. came clean for Sami -- and that was one kid and two engagements ago! He may have honestly believed that keeping it under wraps would have been better before. But now that it's out, I don't see what romantic, financial, or power gain is in it for E.J. to keep lying.

A lesser alternative for a villain would be someone like Gabi. Watching her make the decision about whether or not to move to New York was like watching a toddler play with the family's antique china. Homegirl graduated from the Chloe Lane School of Providing for Your Child. Of course taking an infant away from her family and turning her over to be raised by childcare while you go off to work long hours in the modeling industry would be preferable to, shoot, just about any other situation in the world. Of course, the only way to provide for your child is to take a modeling gig. I really don't know what these numbskulls who take shifts waiting tables after school are thinking.

Don't get me wrong. I'm glad to see that Gabi is starting to realize that she can't leech off Will and Sonny forever. But she's acting like it's either this modeling gig or abandoning all of her dreams and living in a box down at the pier. Taking this job is pure selfishness on her part. I was so glad when Sami told her so.

Will also needs to get comfortable with the fact that Gabi is kind of an asshat. He's tried this "let Gabi have her way" approach for a while now, and Gabi's entertaining the idea of taking Will's child away from him for the third time. While I understand that the trendy impulse is to tell Sami to back off, the lady has primary custody of all her minor children right now. At least a part of Will could learn something from her. After all, having someone who will push back for you when you're too weak to do it yourself is not always a bad thing. If my husband wasn't that person in my life, the cable company would keep gradually raising our bill a few dollars each month, and I'd just go along with it.

Of course if we consulted Maggie, she'd pick Victor. I love me some Maggie, but what was all that noise about Victor not being the man she married? The man she married kept a woman in a sarcophagus and on a deserted island for weeks!

His part in the video scandal was actually pretty light for Victor. He broke no laws. And he's one of the few people who actually had a legit case for the "I tried to tell you, but you wouldn't listen" excuse. But maybe Maggie is just projecting her feelings about her son who's facing a disciplinary hearing and her nephew who just stood trial for assault and drug dealing. Yup, that's what I'm going with so that I don't have to stay mad at Big Red.

Nick is definitely in the running to be NuKristen. Sami mentioned that no one gets a contract like the one Gabi was offered. In probably unrelated news, Nick Fallon/Dark Lord of Cyberspace has been doing a lot of pecking on his laptop. But I'm sure he's probably just trying to beat Nathan in Words with Friends.

Still, he has a very close relationship with Hortons like Maggie and Hope. (At times, he appears to be more accepted as a Horton that Will, no?) Nick is a hard sell for someone who could be as blind mad as Kristen.

I think Anne may actually be the best possibility we have, since she's got Kristen's main quality down -- overreaction. Kristen was so mad that she lost her fiancÚ that she drugged and raped a priest. Anne is so mad that she didn't get the job she wanted that she's actively trying to oust Salem U's best doctor just so Jennifer will be sad. In both cases, the reaction was not at all proportionate to the setback.

Meredith Lynn Scott certainly has the chops to play the bad guy. Now we just need a personal, real reason why Anne is such a crab ass. There's got to be a skeleton somewhere that will fit. Let's find it fast, okay?


LOOSE ENDS
Abe came over to urge Nicole to reach out to Eric because, sure, why not. Abe isn't terribly busy these days. And since Abe and Nicole do share some special people in common, I always like it when Abe looks out for Nicole a bit.

I've grown rather fond of Abigail. But she's been spending way too much time playing the victim of what was a third-hand lie at best. When she mocked, "What does E.J. know," I wanted to shout back, "In this situation, he's right about everything!"

I'm with Daniel when he said "no way in hell" after he and Nicole kissed. I really like this friendship, and I can only see him exasperated over one girl at a time.

I know that Eric will be busy restocking his wardrobe now that he's suspended, but after that, he's going to have to figure out some way to make it up to Nicole. She's not wishing harm on him, and she literally chased down Kristen for hurting him. But, she's still deeply hurt by his accusations. Oh, and she's also face-first in love with him and failing miserably at forgetting that fact. They'll have to work that little detail out too.

I want Shane and Kimberly in town all the time. I want this family to stay together because Theresa's attitude makes a lot more sense when we get to see there's insecurity and pain behind her sass and general knuckle-headery. In fact their glorious presence was almost enough to make me believe that they have authority over their 30-year-old daughter's life. Almost.

Not to agree too much with Theresa, but Jennifer should seriously have no say in where Theresa lives. Also, wouldn't Hope technically be obligated to report that Theresa violated the terms of her plea deal? You know, that whole officer of the court thing and all.


HOT
At first I was a little irritated that Sami offered Gabi an exclusive contract with Countess W. But then I realized that when Gabi turned down that offer, it freed Sami to go after her and have the legitimate excuse of, "Hey, I tried to offer her everything, and she turned me down."

And that, my friends, cleared the way for Kate and Sami to work together. I love it when this happens. And I love it even more that it will be to take down Gabi -- as she is the zit on my DAYS happiness. And I love it most of all because this is a better use of Kate's talents than being the third wheel in the Jordan/Rafe romance.

NOT
At the beginning of the week, Sonny was tremendous. (See: "You know my last name. So do you think I care if you stand here and threaten me?") So why did he end the week apologizing to Gabi and mocking the idea of Will working for E.J.? One, if there's ever a time to put Gabi in her place, it would be when she's threatening to move halfway across the country with Will's kid. Two, the last time Will worked with E.J., Will developed this wonderful thing called a backbone -- otherwise known as the object Will is currently missing.


LINE OF THE WEEK
Theresa: "Oh, God."
Kimberly: "Nope, just me!"


RANDOM THOUGHTS
Lightsaber fight in the DiMera living room! Awesome! I wonder if Johnny's blue sword is an indication that he may be the one who breaks from the evil side of the family and saves the galaxy. #imageek

Was that really Casey Moss playing the guitar? I'm pretending that it was so that he can get even more sensational in my book!

I got a kick out of Nick acting surprised by Gabi's cerebral powers and her elite reasoning deduction. It's like when Chandler would trick Joey into thinking that he was the one who ate the last piece of pizza.

Does Victor have that low of an opinion of Caroline's grandson that he thinks Eric would break his vows just like that?

I liked Nick's NF tag on his backpack.

Thank you, Kayla, for reminding everyone that Anne doesn't have the ultimate authority at the hospital!

I loved Nicole's jacket with the gold studs on the sleeves.

I'm insanely excited for NBC's The Sing Off. (See previous hashtag.)

Not to set the girl power movement back a zillion years here, but why is it a given that Arianna would automatically go with Gabi?

I keep forgetting that Nicole hasn't seen the video.

This casting news makes me wonder if we're going to learn more about Jordan's past soon.

And with that, I'm off to prepare for Thanksgiving. I've got my fingers crossed that Hope hosts this year just so we can all see the Brady house again. Or Lucas could host so that we could, you know, verify that he actually does have a place to live. I often worry about that.


Need more Two Scoops? Head over to read blogs by Laurisa or Tony for more ranting, raving, and all-out randomness

Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of soapcentral.com or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen, what has happened, and to take a look at the logistics of it all. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same view point.
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