I had to title this week's column with what is officially the stupidest idea I have ever heard. A plane that shuttles Salem's, like, five high-rollers to Las Vegas once a week? How many high rollers can Salem possibly have, and is it enough to sustain an airline company? Methinks not.
This week was our introduction to Jeremy Horton and Jett Carver. Now I must say that I love Jett and think that he could be an interesting character (as long as he just says "no" to Lexie when she returns. We know how she is about family and friends), plus he is handsome . Not to mention charming. Now his buddy Jeremy on the other hand was every Neanderthal, misogynist cliché ever spoken, all rolled into a buff, blond package. I half expected him to throw Stephanie over his shoulder and start beating his chest. And he calls her "Sweet Cheeks!" And she LETS him! Sweet Cheeks, people. Her mother gets Sweetness and she gets Sweet Cheeks. I can't believe that goody two-shoes, butter-wouldn't-melt-in-my-mouth Mike Horton spawned …. This. Please, for the actor's sake, I hope the character grows a better personality.
The DiMeras have personality to spare, though. I enjoyed EJ kinda finding a conscience and rescuing Sami from Tony's dastardly plans. As a side note, that's why I love the DiMeras; there are no other villains on the show that you can use the word "dastardly" to describe. So now Tony's really pissed and is threatening to kill EJ and Sami to get her baby. And he just kept on trying. Tony had Bart bump into Sami, sticking her with a needle that knocked her out; next thing she knows, she wakes up duct taped to a steering wheel with carbon monoxide being pumped in. EJ got an anonymous call and got to Sami just in time, effectively saving her life. Not that anyone cared, because Friday should have been called "Step Right Up and Punch EJ in the Face" Day. Between Lucas and Bo that boy should have a broken jaw.
Sami wants to broker a peace deal between the Bradys and the DiMeras. She is trying to figure out what started the whole thing (Grandpa Shawn knows, but for now ain't telling) and how the families can come to some sort of truce. Now for some reason, I could see Stefano maybe being on board with this (if Tony would bother to tell him) as he is old and sick, but Tony is going to be the monkey that stops the show. Jail really made Tony a bit of a psycho, huh? Tony is so bitter and angry and yes, jealous of EJ that he will keep this going just because he can. I was apprehensive at first when I heard about this storyline, because how many times has the "Truth About the Feud" been dangled in front of us and then snatched away at the last second? But it is turning out to be more interesting that I thought, even though it is just beginning.
The whole Nick/Willow/Chelsea thing is wearing very thin for me. I just want Nick to man up and tell that little tramp Willow that he is not doing anything else for her. But first he needs to get that little piece of incriminating evidence out of his possession, because nothing says guilty like having the damn brush in your house, in the police evidence bag. He better get it together soon, or he's going to lose my vote for him getting with Chelsea, because she and Jett are like a little model bride and groom on top of a wedding cake.
This will be the last time I eviscerate Willow in my column, I promise. I was so happy when Hope slapped her, I just kept rewinding it. After about the eighth time, I was able to stop cheering and watch the rest of the scene. What a hateful little skank. Just because her life sucks, she feels the need to manipulate everyone into maximum misery for her own skanky, evil purposes. And I am so glad I will (hopefully) never again hear her plea emphatically that she didn't try to burn down Bo and Hope's house with Ciara and Hope inside. Just in case anyone out there forgot: SHE DID IT. SHE REALLY DID. EJ TOLD HER TO BREAK IN AND STEAL JEWERLY AND SHE ACCIDENTALLY LIT THE CURTAIN ON FIRE WITH A CANDLE. Sorry for the shouting, but just making sure that we are all still in reality here, because she so obviously is not. I think she has really made herself believe that Chelsea did it. But then after Philip came and asked her not to use her baby against Shawn, she seemed like she was maybe going to act like a human for once. I'm sure it's not going to last.
John woke up this week. You know, I love how on soap operas someone can be in a coma for six months and then just get up and start walking and talking in two days. I also love that John is not having any ill effects from having his KIDNEY stolen in a dirty warehouse. He can even make jokes about it. But I'm not going to get too deep into it because I will just give myself a headache. Welcome back Drake Hogestyn!
SOME RANDOM THOUGHTS
I like the new DiMera décor. The old house always reminded me of a really big dungeon. This one does smack of evil, but it has a little more taste I guess.
I can't wait to see where Marlena and John end up moving. Psst, it will probably have a floor plan really similar to Jen and Jack's house. Just a guess.
I can't believe that Shawn and Belle are moving into Casa Kiriakis. Even the logic on that one is a little sketchy to me. Philip is filthy, stinking rich. Can't he just, I don't know, buy himself, Shawn and Belle adjoining condos or something? Maybe a nice duplex? I know, the cost of sets, plus they couldn't have all that interaction with Victor and make it nice and tense that way. Business trip all summer my foot!
I must say that I do enjoy Sami's family actually treating her like … family. They actually seem to respect her and like her. Wow. How times have changed. But where da hell is Roman?
So what will happen next week? Will EJ be able to protect Sami and the baby? Will Lucas implode as EJ protects Sami and the baby? How is Willow going to bite it next week, and will anyone be blamed for it? Will Max realize there is something really wrong with the premise of "Touch the Sky" and pull his support (hope so)? Only time will tell!
Until Next Time!