Swimwear, signatures, and psychos
by Mike
For the Week of July 3, 2017
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Steffy and Katie didn't think bikinis were a bad idea, and Julius thought he was Michael Jackson bad. But nobody does bad better than Sheila! Don't stop 'til you get enough with Two Scoops' Mike!

Has your week been bold and beautiful? Did you party like it was 2009? Did you discover that the pen is mightier than the father? Did you meet your psychotic match? These and more situations faced the Forrester-Logan-Spencer-Avant-Spectra clan this week!

You're not going anywhere, Scoopers! Looks like the Summer of Sheila is upon us and I am loving having Kimberlin Brown back on my screen. I never thought I'd get to columnize about my favorite character! Not sure how I feel about her crushing on Eric, though. Meanwhile, Katie and Steffy marveled over the novelty of the swimwear Forrester's already done, and ink ran like blood for the Avants. Let's Scoop about it!


MARK THE DATE

Like OMG, R.J. and Coco fully made their baeness official by totally posting their pic on social media. I'm gonna keep sayin' it -- these two have never been on a date! R.J.'s supposed to be all swag,but somehow can't manage taking Coco to an Olive Garden. Even Nicole got whisked away on the Spencer jet by Wyatt, and he was just trying to get information out of her. It's called a date, R.J. Google it!

Maybe Roco is better off skipping to relationship status, because they'd probably be talking about Nicole's probable infertility over the bread sticks. Then Zende ambled in, understandably upset that Nicole was hedging about reupping Lizzy's adoption papers and that Julius was fueling that fire. The young'uns suggested that Zende talk to Vivienne. Dude, Zende couldn't think of that himself? And a little child shall lead them.

PAPA DON'T PREACH. NO, I MEAN, PAPA, SERIOUSLY. DON'T.

First off, I have to say I've been glad that Nicole finally acknowledged her maternal feelings toward Lizzy and that she considered raising her biological daughter herself. B&B blew straight past that as soon as Nicole got out of the delivery room, so it was about time. And it took two years, but Rick and Maya finally got some comeuppance for their rotten behavior during Rick's tyrannical tenure as CEO.

Yep, they had it coming, but it happened in rather a cop-out way. Suddenly there's a phantom clerical error on the adoption papers? Oh, come on. That's the same hooey we were served when B&B decided to invalidate Bridge's marriage in 2009. What would have been wrong with Nicole acting on her surge of motherhood by suing for custody? Building a courtroom set would have put the show over budget?

Admittedly, we got the same story, sans judge. But there was one more wonky turn in store. Suddenly the narrative became all "We have to stop Julius." What was that about? It's not like Papa J was telling Nicole anything she hadn't been thinking on her own. She might easily have decided to tear up Lizzy's papers, even if Julius had never left the golf course.

What does Julius do, anyway? Is the proud Avant really letting his wife support him through her job at the DMV? And don't tell me they're still living in that crappy motel room. By the way, did Jules and Viv ever resolve the rift caused by the revelation that Sasha was born because Julius loved Lucy? I wonder where Sasha is these days. Not a peep from her since Zende married Nicole. Any toilets need dipping into?

PAPER CUTS

Unlike someone else we could mention who is hailed for inappropriately shooting from the hip, Julius Avant mostly says all the wrong things for the right reasons. He's pretty much the same bigot who arrived to drag Nicole back to Illinois two summers ago, but it was hard to argue the point when he told his daughter, "It's time that you stop trying to make everyone happy and think of your damn self."

"Maya has been selfish her whole life!" Julius railed, and I found little reason to dispute his statement. Julius even basically said that if Maya were meant to be a mother, she would have been given the proper equipment! Guess he hasn't been as accepting of Maya's gender reassignment as he's claimed, but at least that's a realistic touch, since only on TV do hardcore bigots soften toward the objects of their derision so quickly.

Well, Mama Viv wasn't about it and arrived to snatch her hubby bald! And even though watching two weeks of Nicole's handwringing had gotten boring, Lizzy's adoption arc culminated in a boffo scene with performances worthy of Emmy noms. Maya thought better of asking Nicole to be a surrogate. Nicole admitted to not fully grasping the repercussions. And Viv told her daughters they could both be right. Wow.

Now, Rick barked that he was still Lizzy's father and that he and Nicole had an agreement, which does call to mind a clerical error in B&B's own papers. Say Nicole had torn up the amended agreement. It would then have come down to a custody battle between her and Rick. She couldn't have just spirited Lizzy away. Just another argument for letting the Forrester-Avants battle it out in court.

But when Julius insisted that Maya wasn't Lizzy's real mother, Zende finally got a clue and recalled, "The woman I call Mom isn't my biological mother," implying that he probably would have died in the African orphanage Kristen rescued him from. Too bad Tony didn't get a mention, but message received. Maya even obliquely referred to having lost Jesse's daughter, the girl she came to B&B to find. Nice!

Yes, Maya admitted she'd always wanted to be the kind of parent Mr. and Mrs. Avant weren't, which was consistent with Maya's beginnings. Karla Mosley rocked it as Maya told Nicole she was guilty only of being human and that Nicole would win a court fight because Maya wouldn't fight her. Reign Edwards reigned during this exchange, too. It all rather made the goofiness of how we got here worth it.

But then Nicole went '50s wife and said Zende was the only one she trusted to tell her what to do. Sure, that's why she went through one and almost two surrogacies over his very vehement objections. Whatever; Zende suggested maybe they were meant to adopt, and Nicole signed on the dotted line. Julius scowled. Rick offered a teary apology. (Soap gods, please give Jacob Young more to do!) And that was that.

SVEEMWEAR...VERY NICE

And not 24 hours later, the battling Avant sisters and Lizzy's pop got into board shorts and bikinis and excitedly worked the camera together for a Forrester fashion shoot. But first, we need to back up to how we got there. Katie's had quite a month, going from jewelry designer to gun aimer to life-saver to PR guru. Bobby Reno on Another World didn't change careers that fast!

"I actually started in PR," Katie beamed, which was an accurate throwback to Heather Tom's early days in the role. Another nice touch was Katie admitting that she hadn't done the job since social media became a thing. So who better to hit up for advice than Wyatt, who put "Sexy CEO" Steffy on the map over at Forrester. We know this because we had to watch Leffy making out during a spa day. I tolerated it for shirtless Liam. Rrrrruff.

Something happens on soaps when two single people of the opposite sex suddenly find themselves in each other's orbits. Oh, is Bill gonna be pissed when Kyatt hits the sheets. In the meantime, Katie restricted herself to getting her feet wet, hoping Wyatt would inspire a socko PR move. Well, whaddaya know -- the Spencer Summit in Monte Carlo is upon us once again. Wyatt made the no-brainer suggestion of a fashion show!

Hold the media kits! Katie augmented Wyatt's idea by deciding Forrester should show off a line of swimwear! Sexy! Glamorous! And...done before. Forrester churned out bathing suits in 2008 when Pam brought in cantaloupes to determine Donna's bikini size. Everything old is new again. But everyone was pumped, declaring it was just what they needed to get past the Spectra-stole-our-shizz debacle.

Wasn't there a huge rush to get a new collection on the runway immediately to get past that same debacle? Weren't things so urgent that Steffy and Ridge agreed to give newbie dressmaker Zende a shot because of Thomas' defection? Well, Forrester sure is dragging their designer heels over this one. Two months later, they're ditching the couture they already designed to play beach blanket bingo on the Riviera.

I LOVE I LOVE I LOVE MY CALENDAR GIRL

Remember when CEO Katie pissed Steffy off by choosing Hope's collection idea over hers? Remember when Steffy pissed Katie off by stepping up on Katie's man? Remember when Katie became Steffy's reluctant confidante after Steffy learned her miscarriage had left her barren? Well, Steffy and Katie didn't. They were all smiles as Steffy couldn't wait to hear Katie's idea. Maybe the swimwear should be the BFF line.

Faster than Pam could whip up a batch of the lemon bars she thankfully hasn't mentioned for a while, Forrester converted their sky lounge into a photo studio in preparation for a calendar designed to be a teaser for the Monte Carlo swimwear showing. Okay. So Katie suggests beach attire and the next day, skin is exposed to promote a line that doesn't even exist yet?

And poor Zende missed the shoot because he had to ditch the couture he wanted to prove himself with and start sketching itsy-bitsy teeny-weenies. I hate it when B&B does this. Characters spend weeks doing everything but working then turn out collections overnight when they decide to have a fashion show. I seem to recall the production used to happen alongside the drama. And that Forrester used to have actual models.

Maybe it's another cost-cutting device to have the cast work the runways and cameras instead, but it never rings true. Sure, I've seen Tom Ford in print ads, wearing his own suits. You just wouldn't catch Armani or Versace posing for promotional calendars. At least Maya's a model, but Nicole's in social media. Rick's an executive. Carter's a lawyer. Get the idea? It's all so silly.

At any rate, Katie and Wyatt had some sort of unspoken agreement that Katie would take the credit for this beachwear bash. I'm not sure I get the logic of that, but I do get the inklings of a new couple a mile away. Maybe Kyatt would be good for each other. At least Katie's never been involved with Liam. And Wyatt's a nice guy. He better be, because Katie got over her madness awfully fast. Wyatt's not even over Steffy yet!

IN SECURITY

As if to say #Bold30 goes on, B&B has infused Sheila's shock return with some killer references. "You look different," Sheila told Ridge while trying to make amends to him. "Stephanie was the kind of friend who would take a bullet for me," Sheila smirked to Charlie. And all those '90s music cues that underscored Sheila's initial run in Los Angeles are back, which make her scenes more meaningful. Love it, love it, love it!

But could a Doberman be far behind? Apparently Sheila likes her security guards, because she's gravitated to tall tale Charlie the way she did to the blood test botching Mike Guthrie. Of course, they started out as adversaries, but it wasn't long before Mike aided in Sheila's schemes out of love for her. Remember, he still spoke fondly of her in 2010 and implied she was still alive even though Pheila was dead.

Doubtful that Charlie will similarly become Sheila's crony (Mike, where are you?), but Sheila's Sheila-sense tingled as she picked up on Charlie's dissension in regard to Quinn. Wanting to ensure Eric's well-being, Sheila probed Charlie, who has zero poker face but covered enough to suggest that Sheila get it straight from the horse's mouth, in this case, the horse being Eric.

EX IS JUST ANOTHER LETTER IN THE ALPHABET

I don't know that I like Sheila still carrying a torch for Eric. That was her unhinged rationale in 2002, which led to inadvertently blowing holes in Brooke and Taylor. Given Sheila slipped off the edge in the first place because of miscarrying Scott's baby on Y&R, you'd think she'd fixate on James, the man who actually gave her a child: the long-missing Mary/Erica.

I can't tell if Sheila's concern for Eric is pathology or part of her rehabilitation. It would help if B&B would confirm that Sheila actually spent the last several years in prison instead of just having her claim she has. Even Pam only read on-line reports that Sheila had been jailed more than once; that was true before Sheila showed back up on Y&R in 2005. One definite line would color Sheila's motivation for sure one way or the other.

I also don't know if I wanted to have Sheila return just to see her trail Eric after a couple of weeks. Still, there's a neat dynamic between Eric and Sheila, even if they never noted that the last time they were in the Forrester compound together, Eric punched Sheila out for popping caps in his own exes. Eric assured Sheila that his marriage to Quinn was ace, adding it was inappropriate for her to delve into that subject.

BATTLE OF THE NETWORK PSYCHOS

Well, Quinn came upon Sheila in conference with Eric and didn't like it one bit. "You don't get to do that, not when I'm not home," Quinn spat, consistent with her coming down on Katie for the same reason. But Sheila wasn't having Quinn grabbing her arm to escort her out. "You do that again, and I will snap you in two!" Sheila growled. Yeaaaaaah boyyyyyyy! You don't tug on Superman's cape and you don't mess with Sheila!

Oh, there's something very interesting afoot here. I don't want to see Sheila go psycho again; it's far more interesting and far less predictable that she's actually rehabilitated. But it's not unexpected that she would still have flashes of the [raise eyebrow here] old Sheila. She visited that when the woman bumped into her at Il Giardino and when the waiter spilled water on her. Makes you wonder if something didn't happen to Sheila in prison...

But let's not forget, Quinn is no wide-eyed innocent, regardless of how she comes across now. Quinn's rap sheet is not that different from Sheila's, and I've said all along that Quinn's real story should be trying to rise above her crazy. Wouldn't it be awesome to see Sheila and Quinn try to out-psycho each other? I don't think it would take much to push Quinn in that direction. It would be the very definition of epic!

FROM TINY SEEDS MIGHTY ACORNS GROW

Whenever Ridge and Quinn are in a room now, we always get that undercurrent of something physical between them. Strangely, I think it's a weak undercurrent. And six months of it is enough. By the way, why did Quinn chalk up Deacon's cliff-pushing exposé as "crazy rantings"? Like Ridge doesn't already know what Quinn is capable of? It's a little late for Quinn to try to make herself look good.

Not to mention, there's quite a bit of hypocrisy there. Quinn tries to kill Deacon, but everyone's cool, yet no one wants to forgive Sheila for similar past sins. That's right up there with security guard Charlie being able to afford eating at a posh Beverly Hills restaurant. Yep, Sheila went back to Il Giardino and put Charlie on the menu, buttering him up to try to get him to serve more Quinn tidbits. And he did, about Ridge.

It's not unlike Sheila befriending Maggie Forrester, who didn't know who she was, to collect intel on Stephanie back in 1996. It took Pam to close her lemon bar app and research Sheila; Charlie was horrified to discover who his lunch companion was. And dig Sheila snapping up technology. She was dangerous enough in the '90s without smartphones and laptops! Imagine her threat quotient now that she's plugged in!

Sheila perused what seemed to be a celebrity gossip site and was somehow able to put it together that Ridge and Quinn shared more than a PG rating. "Sure, Eric and Ridge have shared a woman before," Sheila thought to herself, like she used to do. Don't know why B&B didn't go one step further and just say the Forrester men had shared Brooke. That was going on when Sheila arrived in L.A. No flashbacks? Bummer.

Sheila again confronted Quinn, taunting her replacement that she might have something to feel guilty about. "As long as you're a loving, devoted wife," Sheila smiled/sneered, "you have nothing to worry about." Ooh, shades of Lauren Fenmore! I half expect to see Sheila sending a puzzle of Ridge and Quinn in flagrante delicto piece by piece in the mail. Or through Dropbox, as 2017 would dictate. You can see it, can't you?

Sheila ran back to Charlie (nice to see the Forrester security kiosk!) and badgered him into taking her to the Forrester mansion. What for? Sheila's obviously getting around on her own and was just at the compound twice that soap day. Plus, Charlie is on the clock! He can't just go AWOL. That was a weird twist. Then Sheila just sat in Charlie's car, peering through binoculars! Hey, Sheila, Katie still has her telescope, you know.

Anyway, Charlie did a good job deflecting about Quidge, but not so much that Sheila didn't stick her foot in the door he tried to slam. "That would be a mistake," Sheila said in response to Charlie fobbing her off. "A very big mistake." Old Sheila wanted answers now! Did you ever think when this Quidge foolery started in January that it would be Sheila who spilled the beans? Who knew, I ask you! Who knew!

Do you think Nicole did the right thing in regard to Lizzy? Are you on board for Wyatt gettin' some luv from Katie? And are you Team Sheila or Team Quinn? Sign some papers in the Comments section below or on the soapcentral.com message boards, or simply click here to submit feedback. Your comments could wind up in a future column! Like these!

"I'll take any kind of Sheila that we're being given. I hope, that should she actually be rehabilitated that she eventually falls from the wagon, and becomes more deranged and off-the-hinges as she has ever been! Simply having Kimberlin Brown back as Sheila is a dream come true, and it's the one right thing that Brad Bell has done in many years, and I'm hoping he does not screw this up." -- Joel

"Sheila back...a potential Katie/Wyatt hook-up...the Avants at the forefront...#BoldAndBeautiful is trying to keep me happy, for once." -- "brothasoap"

"Loved all the scenes with Sheila. Can't wait to see this unfold. I hated that Nicole signed the papers. Nicole is the only Avant that I like, and I don't like Rick, either. I hope the rumours about Wyatt and Katie are false." -- Christa

"Best decision this show made was to bring Sheila back! Loving it!" -- Richard

Now, B&B, if you would just offer an explanation as to why Sheila has her own face instead of saying "what happens in Genoa City stays in Genoa City," I will be ecstatic. It's nice to see so many people grooving on having Sheila back! Chanel is with you again next week, and I will be back in two. In the meantime, keep watching, be alert, and most of all, be bold. And remember, now more than ever, no matter color, creed, religion, gender identity, or orientation, we're all beautiful.

What are your thoughts on The Bold and the Beautiful? What did you think of this week's Two Scoops? We want to hear from you -- and there are many ways you can share your thoughts.

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Mike (Adam-Michael James)
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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of soapcentral.com or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen, what has happened, and to take a look at the logistics of it all. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same view point.

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