Has your week been bold and beautiful? Did your chick get asked to hatch another egg? Did you decide to move into just the bedroom instead of the whole house? Did you tell your nemesis "You are the weakest link: goodbye"? These and more situations faced the Forrester-Logan-Spencer-Avant clan this week!
Hidey-ho, Scoopers -- feels like it's the Donna of a new day on B&B! Yep, the middle Logan sister came back to find her L.A. world a bit topsy-turvy, though she never officially left. At least Quinn being in power at Forrester Creations might feel familiar, since Eric put Donna in that exact same position when they were first married. Will Donna give Quinn pointers? Let's Scoop about it!
NOTHIN' SAYS LOVIN' LIKE SOMETHIN' FROM THE OVEN
Hold the phone, y'all! That means cell, landline, and Fisher Price! What the hell are Rick and Maya smoking that they had the balls to come to Nicole and ask her to make another baby for them? And Nicole was considering it! Why doesn't she just put a "for rent" sign on her uterus already? I know Raya needs a storyline, but this is the most blatant rehash I've ever seen. Like the first surrogacy story played out so well!
What could have been a kick-ass tale of maternal conflict, or forbidden love, or custody cases, or all of the above ended up just being about Zende ditching a pregnant Nicole to sleep with her BFF/half-sister. Not a single good beat was played. Nicole just ploomped out overnight and gave away her baby like she was donating a sweater to Goodwill. Completely underwhelming. And B&B wants to do it again?
Granted, we could be starting the same way only to have a different endgame. Like Brill seemingly rebooting their affair until the focus shifted to Katie and her drunken downfall. Nicole did admit to Zende that the idea of giving Lizzie a sibling did "something maternal" to her. Plus Rick and Nicole looked strangely cozy sitting there fawning over their biological daughter. Is Maya gonna have to fight for her man?
Hearing Raya's request, Sasha bruised her jaw when it hit the floor. Mine hurts, too. We don't need Nicole to carry another Raya baby to make this story right. All we need is for Nicole to embrace her motherly feelings and decide she wants to raise her own child. And/or that she wants Rick for herself. Anyone else get the feeling Zende was trying to knock Nicole up first the way he was frenching her at the Forrester Sky Lounge?
Still, Sasha cut Thomas loose so Douglas could have his parents together. Maybe the girl who tried to toilet-dip Zende into a lasting relationship is growing up! Or is her "a child comes first" admission a foreshadowing that she's about to take over as Raya's incubator? Really wish Rick and Maya would get a non-baby story. With all the fuss about restrooms alone, surely Maya's journey as a transgender woman isn't over.
REUNITED AND IT FEELS SO...2011...AND 2012...AND...
I'm not gonna lie: I actually fast-forwarded through Liam and Steffy's reunion sex. Not because I don't enjoy seeing Scott Clifton without a shirt, but because I just have no desire to invest in them as a couple. No tea, no shade: I couldn't invest in Steffy and Wyatt, either. Or Wyatt and Ivy. Or Liam and Ivy. Change the month on your calendar and there's a different configuration. All these couplings lack substance. And logic.
"You're kinda it for me," Liam swooned to Steffy. He can say that in the same bed he took Hope's virginity? And how about it being the same bed where Liam saw Steffy snoozing with Wyatt? That STILL hasn't come up; it was the whole reason Liam dumped Steffy and ended up being spirited away by Quinn, but the show continues to act as if it didn't happen. The scripts might have forgotten, but we haven't!
Okay, so Steffy ditched Wyatt because he told Quinn she has Eric's power of attorney. I don't blame Steffy for that. I also understand Steffy running to Liam, because she wasn't over him when she married Wyatt; you know Steffy only hates Quinn because Quinn slept with Liam. (And "Adam" liked it.) Do-the-right-thing Steffy opted to sideline sex until she was free. Then we started singing choruses of "Let's do the time warp again!"
Liam was horny; Steffy wanted to wait. That's 2011, only it was Hope who hit the brakes on him then. "I wanna do this the proper way," Steffy insisted -- kinda like 2012, when she held out for a divorce, refusing an annulment. I guess Steffy's consistent that way. Which made her deciding to do the horizontal tango with Liam anyway after declining to move in with him all the more baffling!
Liam must be a bigger stud than Daddy Dollah, because his milkshake brings all the girls to the yard and makes them have sex with him against their better judgment. Hope, Steffy, Ivy, Quinn...Karen would probably play the other team for Liam if they weren't related. But whereas Hope needed drugs to be a technical adulterer, Steffy had no problem with such infidelity, despite her saying "I'm married" minutes before.
Sure, for someone who sped through the Leffy luvin, I'm covering it enough. I just found the plotting wonky, not to mention reductive, as Madonna would say. Liam, Steffy, Wyatt, Ivy -- they've all changed partners too often and done too much to each other for me to root for any permutation of these pairings. That's why I found myself shipping Quiam months ago. At least "Adam" and "Eve" was different!
SIGN YOUR NAME ACROSS MY HEART
Quiam made sense because Liam and Quinn generated serious sparks during their hostile feud. You know who's bringing that heat now? Ridge and Quinn! With their similar animosity, I wouldn't be surprised if Ridge and Quinn hit the sheets one day, and some of the more out-there spoilers suggest exactly that. In the meantime, Quinn gave Ridge and his brood the "space" to visit the recovering Eric.
Despite everyone from R.J. to Nicole gushing over him, the only person the barely lucid Eric became animated for was Brooke! Zende deeming Eric a "badass granddude" was cool, but the lovefest quickly dissolved into such a sticky-sweet pile of goo that I was grateful the nurse came in and booted everyone out. But Eric wanted Ridge to stay behind. Clearly the Forrester patriarch had something to impart!
Not that you'd know, because Ridge kept talking over Eric instead of letting Eric finish the sentences he could barely put together. Ridge blustered through his rationale for telling Quinn he had Eric's power of attorney. While Eric choked out one and two words at a time, Ridge whipped out a new POA document for Eric to sign. You'd think Ridge would be a little more diplomatic with Eric, given the chilliness between them right now.
Ridge rightly reasoned that Quinn couldn't handle running a corporation as complex as Forrester, suggesting Eric even put Rick or Brooke in control; anyone but Quinn. I do think Ridge's heart has been in the right place through all this; he's just the same bulldozer he's been for nearly three decades. Repeating "my wife, my wife," Eric hit the button on his hospital bed to summon Quinn to the room. Then Ridge got an earful!
Eric struggled but succeeded to tell Ridge he'd been aware enough during his coma to know that his not-bio son had kept Quinn away from him. Eric ordered Ridge out, but Quinn found Ridge downstairs, waiting for her. How many times do we have to hear Quinn insisting she's changed and Ridge swearing he'll purge her? And how can Ridge cite Quinn's "gold-digging ways?" Murderous, yes, but Quinn's never gone after money.
The next day, Carter, who now also seems to be Team Queric, produced the contested unsigned marriage license, which Quinn and Eric added their John Hancocks to in front of Wyatt. "I'm sorry you lost Steffy," Eric empathized, "but you have me now." Eric proved to be a better stepdaddy to Wyatt than the missing Deacon ever was by insisting that Wyatt move into the Forrester mansion! "People come and go so quickly here!"
"BRIDGE-ING" THE GAP
R.J. rolled like it was September by once again walking in on his parents in a close moment and expressing his desire for a Bridge reunion. He did that five weeks ago then disappeared under all the hoopla over Quinn and Eric. Yet we're picking up with the Brill/Bridge push-pull as if nothing happened. Why didn't Brooke just marry the shares out of Bill while Queric's wedding was still considered invalid?
The show does this. It focuses on one story and drops the rest of the balls, then feverishly tries to pick them up while they're bouncing all over the place. Everyone's story should move in tandem; I realize that can't be easy to plot out, but other shows do it. R.J.'s still shipping Bridge, and Bill's still whining about a teenager keeping him from bagging Brooke. Katie razzing Bill about that was fun, though. He totally had it coming!
I will say that R.J. had valid points, and unique ways of making them. Seeing that Ridge still had the feels for Brooke, R.J. told him "You're a designer, right? Then design your life." R.J. also noted that Bill would probably treat Brooke the same way he did Katie (I can see Bill cheating and locking Brooke in a tower). But the teen's closing argument was that it had been "Brooke and Ridge, Ridge and Brooke all my life." Wrong!
R.J., your mama spent much of your childhood chasing Nick while papa kept bouncing back to Taylor. And Brooke was already with Bill while you were channeling Chucky in boarding school. I know kids have selective memories, but come on. Interestingly, Rick didn't want Brooke with Bill any more than R.J. did, though he wouldn't vote for Ridge, either. Appropriate these days, wouldn't you say, Scoopers?
DONNA ALWAYS SEEM TO GO THAT YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'VE GOT 'TIL IT'S GONE
Across town, Donna Logan unceremoniously slinked into the offices of Spencer Publications. No buildup; she was just there. This girl's let Pam run the reception desk at Forrester alone for over a year, and the first person she goes to see is Bill? And Donna is Team Brill, too, which seems odd to me; she was in the middle when Katie and Brooke battled over Bill the first time. You'd think she wouldn't side so easily. I think Jennifer Gareis is a wonderful Donna, but I admit it threw me a bit seeing her after I spent recent weeks catching up with 1987 episodes of B&B on YouTube; of course, Carrie Mitchum was playing Donna back then. The brunette who worked at a diner and struggled to assert her independence having just become an adult returns as a blonde gypsy back from traveling the world. Funky. It's good to see Donna, though.
Unlike nephew R.J., Donna was clued in to how Bill's 12½% stake in Forrester factored into his wedding to Brooke. "After everything you did to get a chunk," Donna sighed. Seriously? You were the one who sold that stock to Bill after you got it in your divorce from Eric! Donna was never what you would call an A-story character, but she's legacy. I hope she gets more to do than support Brill. (Wyatt's available, Donna. Just sayin'.)
Ridge is world famous for waffling between Brooke and Taylor, but he outdid himself this week just focusing on Brooke. One minute Ridge nearly commanded Brooke to marry Bill because Ridge needed the shares (don't see how that's gonna override Quinn's power of attorney, but whatevs); the next, Ridge tried to talk Brooke out of it. He even found middle ground by suggesting Brooke could divorce Bill after getting the shares!
Ridge got so flustered that he accepted Brooke's determination to marry Bill with a forlorn "Okay...okay..." then turned around and planted one on Brooke so passionately, my thighs was burnin'! Now that's the Ridge Forrester we know and love! Lucky, lucky Brooke. She didn't necessarily think so until Bill called and asserted they were getting married today, to hell with R.J. Me caveman! Me drag Brooke by hair!
Ivy, M.I.A. while her love Liam got his wish with Steffy, arrived to visit Uncle Eric and was posted as a watchdog by Quinn as she and Wyatt left for Forrester to carry out Eric's orders. Near marrieds Wyatt and Ivy had a brisk "here's your hat, what's your hurry" interaction -- plus Wyatt didn't say word one about Ivy's inexplicable American accent. Ivy has no chance with Liam anymore. Why not reclaim her Australianness?
Ivy sent Pam and Charlie down under, however, when they entered the no-Quinn zone and were denied access to Eric unless Ivy could get permission from Quinn. I'm beginning to think Ivy hit her head on that plane, not Liam. Push me off a bridge and see if I become your bestie. At least Ivy got rid of those damn lemon bars. If I have to hear about them one more time, I'm shoving Pam in the oven along with them!
Hearing Eric had called a meeting but was sending Quinn to speak for him, Ridge filed into Eric's office with Brooke, Rick, Thomas...and Zende. Mr. Forrester-Dominguez is at best a photographer and at worst an intern. He's not executive level. What the hell was he doing there while president Steffy was absent spending time with Liam? Wyatt must have felt like Rodney Dangerfield, because he got no respect in that room, no respect.
The Trump/Hillary-style put-downs went on as Rick snarked that Queric's now-legal marriage cost Wyatt his own, and Thomas blew Wyatt off as Quinn's fan club. Then the strangest thing happened. Reminded that they'd flaked on Eric's wedding, Thomas told Quinn "You backed us into a corner" and Zende followed with "We had to take a stand." This after they all boo-hooed to Eric how sorry they were for taking that very stand?
Ridge rolled his eyes, telling Quinn that he was running the company despite her POA. "Not so fast, grasshoppa," Quinn retorted. (She didn't really say that, but she might as well have.) By royal decree of Eric, Ridge was done, and Quinn would be taking over as acting CEO. And by the way, Steffy was out on her leather-clad behind as well and could take her presidential nameplate off her door!
Annnnnd....here we go. Eric marries woman family disapproves of, Eric falls ill and puts disapproved-of woman in charge of Forrester, disapproved-of woman fires people. Except that's not just 2016 -- it's 2008, when Donna sacked Ridge, Felicia, and a host of others as Eric lay comatose in the hospital. How ironic that Donna should come back now! Not to mention Eric was only in that coma because of Pam's damn lemon bars!
Personally, I'm over the company takeovers; it's so overdone. Quinn's at least run her own business, unlike Donna, but still, I don't know why we can't come up with something fresh. "My past is irrelevant," Quinn declared. I don't think so! You know, if Quinn really wants to actually prove she's changed, all she has to do is not use Eric's power of attorney. Will that power go to her head? Will she revert to Psycho Quinn?
Use your power by telling us your thoughts in the Comments section below or on the soapcentral.com message boards, or simply click here to submit feedback. Your comments could wind up in a future column! Like these!
• "Can't believe all the negativity on Ridge. If Quinn didn't have the history, I might feel the same way. Eric was being the ass. Just like Stephanie always said, he has no backbone. He would have never accepted that kind of behavior from anyone else. Look how he acted when he found out about Caroline and Ridge even though he knew how Rick was treating Caroline...Steffy definitely needs to kick Wyatt to the curb for disrespecting her wishes by going straight to his mother knowing more than anyone what Quinn is capable of." -- "ndavlin"
• "Quinn & Eric's sweet love story...'Wyatt, my son'.....Rick & daughter time." -- "A Berkeley Gal"
• "Show has rocked since it shifted to Eric and Quinn. All done with Steffy/Liam/Wyatt." -- Elaine
• "I'm really enjoying Ridge getting his comeuppance & shocked how sympathetic I'm feeling towards Quinn." -- "Gee Girl"
That's the thing, right? Alfred Hitchcock did that in his movies all the time: he made the audience feel bad for the bad guy. Quinn may truly love Eric after all, but I still need to see her get comeuppance before I can cosign Queric. Hey, Liam, wanna get Steffy to love you forever? Reopen your case against Quinn! She might not go to jail, but her deeds would be splashed across all media. Hope could come back to testify!
Let's make our own case with some Points to Ponder:
Bridget supposedly visited Eric. Too bad we didn't get to see it... Taylor fans are probably torqued that Ridge says he hasn't loved anyone more than Brooke... Bill hates Quinn. Why can't he vote his shares with Ridge, Steffy, and Thomas instead of bribing Brooke with them?... Quinn and Eric shared a pair of glasses signing their marriage license. Surely they don't have the same prescription... Who took the photo of Brooke and Bill riding camels in Abu Dhabi? No one had a camera, even in the flashback!
Regarding Quinn and change, Liam sniffed, "She never has and she never will." "Adam" of all people knows Quinn has another side!... "He lets himself be snowed by women like you," Ridge snarled to Quinn about Eric. I don't think that fairly speaks to Lauren, Donna, or Jackie, but it's the first concrete, if embedded, reference to Sheila since Queric began... In my last column I wondered why a hospital wing was named after Joseph Bevacqua. Now I know -- he's one of B&B's set decorators!
One other acknowledgement I must make is the passing of Anthony Addabbo, who played twins Rush and Johnny Carerra in 1997-1998, and also Jim on GL around 2000. Addabbo was only 56, which is far too young. (Bye, Johnny; I had a total crush on you.)
Need a refresher on Donna and/or other B&B characters? Check out my streamlined character profiles and enjoy digging into the pasts of your favorites. See y'all in two weeks, and keep up with my exploits on Twitter. Keep watching, be alert, and most of all, be bold!
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