When Felicia looked at Nick upon hearing that he was married to Bridget and expecting their first child and said 'Well, that's sucks.' I did quite literally fall of the couch! Truer words have never been written for this show...EVER. I laughed out loud and felt that even though she may have scrambled to clarify herself later, she said what many of us have been thinking for a long time. It does suck but then again I suppose we are stuck with this Bridget thing for the time being. But boy isn't it going to be interesting to watch the Felicia fall-out! With all that piss-and-vinegar she goes on with, Bridget has her work cut out for her.
While I enjoyed her return, I was also a little saddened to realize that she has a kid in tow that will likely not get the attention from Nick that he deserves due to the obvious emotional outburst we know will be coming from Malibu Barbie. She is too immature to deal with this and when you really think about it, Nick may not be ready to deal with it either. He has become a waffling shell of his former self. Which brings me to my next BIG point...
I got to thinking this week about what has happened to Nick's character since he appeared on the scene. He came into the show with an air of mystery. He was the brooding and cynical sea captain that let everyone know that he was his own man and not about to compromise his convictions for anyone. His first meeting with the first (and best) Bridget was a rather surly exchange on his part and further illustrated how manly and aloof he could be. We all know he grew up without a Dad and he focused solely on being a sailor to somehow make up for a lack of intimate connections as a child. Ok, no problem. He had the peacoats and turtlenecks going on not to mention the beard (sorry, I love facial hair on a guy). Hard drinking, hard talking...in short, a man's man.
Enter Brooke Logan. Once he fell for her, the change began. First the beard went. Then the cigars. The sailor gear was soon to follow and something more sinister began to take shape...he started singing. He became goofy (around Hope it was very cute, though). He became a weak, begging, and tentative mess after the Brooke-Ridge situation. He slept with Brooke after she thought Ridge died and now that so much time has gone by, I see that as a bit desperate and not at all what the original Nick would have done. I know both of them did it and it was inappropriate from the beginning, but it seemed to signal the beginning of Captain Dominick Payne's 'deconstruction'.
Don't get me wrong...I still like watching him onscreen but I have to say it's less than before. I cringe at the songs now. I can't stand how he runs around behind Brooke and Bridget shrugging his shoulders and begging and pleading for their love and attention. He seems a little like a puss now. Even his clothing makes me feel the guys from Queer Eye are dressing him. I personally would rather see the Gorton's fisherman look myself. But I held out hope and thought that maybe if he could once and for all BE with Brooke in the right way, we may be treated to shades of our hot sea captain once more. Then I heard in the distance a loud sucking sound that turned out to be Malibu Barbie sucking out the last shred of manhood he had left.
After we were all teased at the possibility of Brooke and Nick being together due to her magical revelation on the Marlin, Barbie announces 'Oops, I'm still pregnant and I was just testing you Baby'. All bets were off and Nick went into waffling overdrive as he couldn't decide what to do or who to be with. 'I want to be with Brooke'. 'What do I do, what do I do??' He wanted to make it clear to Bridget he would be with Brooke no matter what but he let Brooke make the decision for him over and over again. I have never seen so much nonsense between two people in any soap ever! His waffling was second only to Ridge and even Ridge hasn't waffled that much recently. At least he finally decided on Taylor, for God's sake! Back and forth, back and forth...AHHHHH! After finally making a decision to try it again with Bridget (why I still can't understand), his behavior became even more pathetic as we have been tortured day after day with silly stomach dialogue and sappy speeches about reconnecting and committing himself fully to her and the baby. Blah blah blah. She is still the second choice and I don't care what kind of spin he puts on it. His character has become less and less attractive to me lately and it really saddens me as there is an obvious shortage in men who act like men and not skirt chasing spineless wimps who can't make a decision if their life depended on it.
Now enter Felicia Forrester with little Dominick following behind. What does he do now? According to his own philosophy, he should live with any child that is his to provide the fatherly influence. Well, he can't be in two places at once, right? One of the kids will lose and while this situation is not ideal, it happens in real life all the time. If Felicia dies suddenly, then he will be left raising the child himself...with who, Bridget? Will the spoiled little princess be ok with that? I don't know. I guess it depends on whether her child survives or not. But it's a soap and we all know there is a true suspension of reality here so if she loses her child she may be happy to raise his son and all will live happily ever after. Yeah, right. I'm sure Brad has something interesting in store for us and it won't be as cut and dried as we think.
Is there hope for Nick's character? I am afraid Brad is taking him down the path of being either the next Brooke or the next Ridge. The comparison to Brooke being that he is starting to roll through Forrester (or Forrester-related) women and now will have fathered two kids from two different AND related women. Yuck. I know people keep throwing around the word 'incest' a lot and while it is technically not incest, it is creepy nonetheless. Ok, so now Bridget's kid will be Felicia's niece, Nick will be Daddy to Bridget's kid and Daddy/Uncle-in-law to Felicia's kid and Felicia and Bridget's kids will be half-cousins AND half-siblings! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I can't take it! This is just too disturbing for words! It's like some sick West Virginia joke from 30 years ago! The comparison to Ridge comes in the behavior of wanting one and constantly obsessing about another for the rest of his life. Ridge has gotten away with this for years between Taylor and Brooke and now it seems that Nick is doing the same (see 'waffling' reference from above). Good Lord, when does it all stop??
And while I am just bitching in general, when is someone on this show going to get married and THEN get pregnant??? Think about it... Thorne and Darla married after the drunken one-night stand produced little phantom Alexandria, Brooke had Hope and RJ outside of marriage, Felicia, and now Bridget. I know...Bridget and Nick tried to marry before she became pregnant but they couldn't get a ceremony to actually finish. But still...I would love to see a couple fall in love, have a baby, and have at least 11 or 12 minutes of happiness before all Hell breaks loose. I think this show could use a healthy relationship.
My rants for the week...what's all this nonsense about Stephanie and Eric secretly still loving each other? Sure, and I'm the Tooth Fairy. All this 'can't we all just get along' rhetoric by Thorne is well-intentioned but pretty unrealistic. I say keep fighting...makes for more exciting TV than what we had last week. And I have to keep the path to my toilet clear as the hot and horny scenes between Bridget and Nick are nauseating beyond belief! She has the incompetent cervix and all Nick and think about is continuing to mark his territory! Another example of his character becoming more like Ridge than I care to admit openly. His statements are nearly chauvinistic and so far out of character from the old Nick. And I did not like how he talked to Felicia, either. He seemed too indifferent though I'm sure his demeanor will change after he finds out she has his son. He better be as willing to do the right thing by her and that boy as he is for Malibu Barbie and his daughter. Geez, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, does it? You could say he is populating the Earth much like his 'Pop'...baby here, baby there. One in every port, huh?
Last week's question about the importance of Felicia's return garnered a surprising response from everyone. Most did not care and felt pretty ambivalent about her coming back at all. A few felt that her child will help put an end to the Bridget-Brooke-Nick triangle and for that hey are grateful. But it was an overwhelming majority that didn't think her return would help things. I disagree...she could bring about enough strife that things could get shaken up just enough to spark some life in this dying show. Yes, I said dying. It's boring. Yes, I said it...boring. I like Leslie Kay's take on Felicia and think she could do a great job. She's catty and tells it like it is. I'm holding out hope...
The question of the week...how do you feel about Nick Marone? In general, from start to finish or even just how you feel about his character as written now, what are our thoughts?
The role call was fantastic and makes me feel truly blessed that I am read each week by so many from all around the world. The Net is a wonderful thing, huh? Some of the countries represented were...Canada (x2), Australia (7 folks down under reading the Scoops!), Holland, Denmark, 2 folks in England, Honduras, Norway, Germany, Belgium, India, 2 brave service folks stationed in Iraq, and folks from these states here in America: 2 in NV, 3 in NY, 3 in TX, DC, MO, KS, CA, MI, SD, GA, TN, PA, VA, AL and MA. WHEW! What a list! I'm big! I'm international! How did this happen? Not sure but I appreciate more than all of you know that my column is something so many follow and make a part of their Monday morning routine. I write it for the pure love of writing and for the privilege to entertain readers like you. Many, many thanks.