I stepped outside on my patio this morning and could have sworn that I heard Sigmund Freud about to spin out of grave! Being a former student of human behavior and an always amused student of Freud's theories, I am beginning to believe that ol' Brad probably read them a time or two himself. Last week's shows could not have illustrated the twisted and dysfunctional mother-son bond more than watching Stephanie's manipulation of Ridge. Ewww. Just disgusting.
For those a little rusty on their Greek/Freudian stories on Oedipus, here is the bottom line...it's about a mother being in love with her son as a 'replacement' for the husband. So, with that in mind, we might as well have heard Stephanie say she is in love with her 'Widgie'. It was so disconcerting to listen to her ramble on to Brooke about how he is her 'little boy' and that he loves her more than he loves Brooke. Here's my question...why are the writers painting this picture now and what are the viewers supposed to come away with? What's the 'entertainment' value of all this? This is classic 'carrot dangling' in my opinion and all these 180 degree turns in the story are starting to prove my theory that there are 5 or 6 people locked away in a room with varying ideas about what to write and none of them mesh. We are quite literally all over the map every week now with no continuity and no character development...unless of course you call making Brooke a giggling homicidal maniac 'character development'. I don't. I have watched years of the nonsense between her and Stephanie but have never quite seen something so ridiculous. Was it interesting to watch? Yes, because it was so comical. Really, how could anyone take that scene seriously or come away feeling anything for either character involved. All I kept wondering was how KKL and Susan Flannery kept a straight face long enough to get one good take out of it.
I know, I know...I'm being negative again, right? Well, last week's column was the happy, feel-good slant and after this past week of 'I can't believe I am watching this', the rants just started flowin'! Nick shows up and acts like a cop to save Brooke from hospital orderlies, Stephanie sneering through her ventilation tube as Brooke is escorted out, Ridge's brains leaking out all over the floor as he takes orders from his Mommy and Thomas letting his parents alone to have 'some action'? Someone, make the pain stop!!!!!!!!! Who is writing for this show...Sybil? You mean to tell me the ONLY way this 'Which Wife Is It Anyway' story could be played out is for Stephanie's heart attack to spur Ridge into action? And are we supposed to believe that Taylor, who I have always credited for being the smartest female on this show, is 'ok' with being the one chosen under duress? Who among you readers would want to know THAT'S why you were chosen? Not me, sister!
What's next? Thorne develops a split personality and goes on a 5 state killing spree? The Twins quit school to become U2 groupies? Brooke finds out that she is really Eric's daughter resulting from a drunken tryst with Beth Logan? Maybe we find out that Massimo is Dante's father (after all he seems to have not only the most financial power in the world but the most potent sperm ever!)? While we are at it, let's make Hope Thorne's child and send Darla into an alcoholic spiral of destruction. Bridget will go 'Fatal Attraction' on her fiancé Nick who she finds out still has the hots for Mommy Dearest and barbeques the Shady Marlin! Nick narrowly escapes and is found adrift by hippies that rehabilitate him into a non-smoking vegan who has no memory of his former life and plays his guitar for money in LAX to survive. Ridge and Taylor squeeze out a few more kids since in B&B land normal reproductive years have no boundaries whatsoever and you can have kid well into your 40's and 50's and still look like you just graduated from college last weekend. See my point? How silly are things going to get before we all get some writing that not only we can 'sink our teeth into' but also MAKES us watch each and everyday for fear of missing one deliciously decadent soap moment? Oh, how I yearn for those days as a viewer!
On the lighter side, I did enjoy seeing shades of the old Brooke coming back. As I said last week, I would take her being catty over weepy any day of the week. Unfortunately, we saw her going back to her old house with her tail between her legs and crying yet again (and on Nick's shoulder...we all know what that means!). I am hoping she comes out of this stronger though and if she has the dirt on whatever it is that Taylor did or did not do with Dante, she just might get her swagger back and give Saint Taylor a run for her money. Speaking of Taylor, she probably should not get too cozy as Lady of the Manor...Ridge is proving himself to be anything but firm in his decisions these days and as soon as he is faced with Brooke and RJ, his spine will melt away again. It just seems that the back and forth will never end, doesn't it?
I heard rumors that Brooke 'turns' to Eric for comfort. Please lets not go back to that well again! We have been there, done that and that could be the last straw from many Brooke supporters as it would again show her character to be clingy, codependent, and incapable of independence. I believe this could be a great turning point for her character as a result of this shotgun renewal of Ridge and Taylor. Brooke could tell all the Forrester's to go to Hell and focus on her kids and her place in the fashion world. She could be the new poster child for independence and resolve that could inspire many...but if she hooks up with Eric for pity sex, all bets are off. I am hoping for the former.
Who believes in déjà vu? Ok, did it seem we were all magically transported back in time to 1992 when Brooke did not get to the church in time THEN either? Haven't we already seen this very same scene only now played out in a hospital room instead of a church? ATTENTION WRITERS...STOP HITTING THE 'START COPY' BUTTON ON THE XEROX MACHINE IN YOUR OFFICE! PLEASE!
Now that I got that off my chest, it's on to the results of last week's deep, probing query...who is the sexiest character on B&B? The results were not entirely surprising as Nick got 10 votes and the most overall. However, Thorne was a very close second with 8 votes and what I found interesting was that those who chose him felt that overall 'sexiness' did not necessarily have to do with looks as much as it could also be about 'character'. Those who voted for him felt his goodness, decency, and sense of fair play made him sexy all by itself. Hmmm...interesting. Dante got one vote and a couple of my male readers felt Brooke was the sexiest. Not surprising there! Note...not one vote for Ridge or for Hector. I guess the fair-haired men rule on B&B!
Well, I am hoping for better days this week and will again be looking in my mailbox for my complimentary ticket to LA from Brad Bell. I know it will come...I just have to be patient. Note to Brad-I like window seats on planes and hotels with in-house gyms. I'll bring my own laptop.
This week's question...do you think Taylor has really 'WON' now? Can she safely let her guard down and move her toothbrush back into the master bathroom? I can't wait to read your thoughts on this!
A Happy 4th of July to all my American readers both here and abroad! Throw another weenie on the grill for me and have a safe and happy holiday!
Who's on the Soapbox?
Ryan writes... '...the answer to the question is undebateable...Brooke...she is sexy, sometimes strong, often vulnerable but always delicious looking...'
Annie writes... '...I have reached the point where I stopped wasting my time watching B&B and instead read The Scoop and your commentary which are much more worth my time...the Ridge wife contest is just a bit too much to bear...I think Taylor should kick him to the curb and let him stay with Brooke...they deserve each other.'
Until next week, stay in touch with your thoughts...it's the best part of my week when I hear from everybody!