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 Two Scoops: September 26, 2005 columns
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Colleen Zenk
The teen scene
For the Week of September 26, 2005
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When Will and Barbara tried to convince Jennifer to tell the doctors what they wanted to hear last week, just so she could be released from loony land, it rang true. Who doesn't remember the awful times Will and Barbara had in the mental ward?
The baby-switch story has me riveted. Kudos to the writers for this complicated tale. Jennifer Ferrin is absolutely mesmeric every time she gets a scene. Sure, Jen is cranked up on meth, but a mother's instinct is a mother's instinct. Her utter desperation to get anyone to believe her makes the audience feel for her, despite her past indiscretions.


What makes the story even more poignant is the history. When Will and Barbara tried to convince Jennifer to tell the doctors what they wanted to hear, just so she could be released from looney land, it rang true with viewers. Who doesn't remember the awful times both Will and Barbara had in the mental ward?


My only two complaints are these: Why didn't Dusty, Jen or Hal insist on a DNA test that would put the whole mess to rest? Rory's DNA is already on file. And why hasn't Mike been anywhere near Jen in weeks? He supposedly loved this woman, yet he hasn't so much as visited, since her life fell apart. Other than that, this story just gets better and better. My money is on Dusty to figure out the whole mess, using the "stork" birthmark theory. I always knew that guy was a private eye in the making. Forget Street Jeans. His talents lie elsewhere.


Meanwhile:
--Casey has some nerve asking Maddie where she learned to speak English, when he's the one who needs subtitles. Can anyone understand what this kid is saying? Please, Casey, learn to enunciate.


--Thumbs way up for Bob and Will's talks. These scenes are heartwarming and funny. I'm glad Will has somebody in his life doling out parenting advice these days, considering his real folks have dropped the ball. The added bonus: Getting to hear grandpa Bob say the term, "scoping out babes." File that under things I never thought I'd hear.


--I realize that Henry has always been a slacker, but it's time for him to get serious. Well, as serious as Henry can get, anyway. He needs a job, ASAP. And let's face it, to be a true leading man, he needs an income, a house and money to buy martinis for any future dates. I'm sure the guy is a business whiz. Let him work with Lucinda and get some respectability. (Hey, it worked for Dusty.) Then, maybe Henry can get a social life that doesn't involve a bottle of vodka and a rabbit.


--Times sure have changed, since I was a teenager. I guess it's perfectly acceptable now to make out with your date in front of your parents. Casey kissing Lea, as Margo walked in, had me squirming. If I were Margo, I'd be using that yellow police tape on Casey's overactive lips. I'm convinced Casey has lost whatever sense he ever had.


--This bugged me. Katie called Henry "one of the best friends" she's ever had. Um, does anyone know of any other friends she's had? I'd say Henry qualifies as THE one and only best friend. Period. Well, if you count Snickers the rabbit, I guess it could go either way.


--So, how much "doughnut money" do you think young Maddie Coleman has socked away? They myth of that doughnut money is starting to crack me up. Wouldn't it be hilarious if the kid has thousands of dollars saved?


--I don't know whether to smack Jack or hug him. I was cheering when he called Carly on her lies and plot to take down Gwen. Throwing the Sage paternity mess in Carly's face was just what she needed. It was nice to hear Jack saying what viewers have been thinking all along about Carly's hypocritical actions. But then, he seemed to forgive her too easily. I expected more out of Jack. He is the purveyor of truth and justice, and knowing Gwen got a raw deal, due to Carly's conniving, should be eating at him.


--Do young girls really get together at parties and show off their breast implants? Do girls that age really have breast implants? Help. Anyone? Was that party reflective of teen parties these days? The show did get points for realism with Lea's obnoxious cell-phone ringer playing a pop tune. But, as for realism and the party overall, I'm baffled. Do high school girls really get new boobs to go along with their new fall wardrobes? Gee, I remember the days when a new Trapper Keeper was the talk of the girls' bathroom.


--Did anyone else love that scene between Barbara and Hal when they were looking for Jen's drugs? It's easy to forget all the wacky things Barbara has done in the past few years, when we see her in these emotional family scenes. I hope we get more of that. Although she's a good villain, I sometimes wish the writers hadn't made her go so far off the deep end at times. Bitchy Barbara was always entertaining enough, without all the other craziness.


--Paul is despicable. There is no other word for it. How could a decent brother watch his sister suffer and not reveal the one thing that would make her better. It's absolute hogwash. The Paul we used to know and love would never do such a thing. Yes, he was dark sometimes, but only when he felt he'd been wronged. (Hello, Rose and James.) But Paul never would have willingly hurt his family. It's obvious Paul is being transitioned to the villain-we-love-to-hate role that Craig vacated.


--Maddie Coleman may need a muzzle. But, finally, we have someone to keep up with Henry's one-liners. She was firing off sarcasm all over Oakdale this week. This was one of her best, when she introduced Henry to her classmate Lea: "She makes Paris Hilton look like a Rhodes Scholar, so don't even waste your breath." Priceless.


--Will could teach Casey a thing or two about character. Casey is a brat, but probably the more realistic teen of the two. He caters to peer pressure, tries too hard to be "cool" and seems to be interested in only one thing: closing the deal with the closest teenage girl in sight. In contrast, Will seems years older than Casey. His maturity makes sense, considering the life he's had. Watching Will take the high road and defend Gwen to a room full of gossiping teens, was impressive. He's the teen hero we all wish we had been. In reality, most of us probably would have behaved like Casey and his posse of gossip mongers.


--It's seems Byron may be a little obsessed with Katie. Do we really need another nut stalking her? The Mike/Henry/Katie triangle has enough tension in it to give us plenty of drama, without introducing another stalker to go after Katie. We've been there before with Pilar and Dahlia. Oakdale is already crowded. I hate it when a character is added that isn't really needed. It just takes screen time away from favorites and other minor players, who we don't see often.


--Mike gets the jerk award for the week. His treatment of Henry had me boiling. Mike's eviction behavior was a bit harsh. Henry has lived in that house for years, first as Katie's roommate and then as her husband. Mike is no saint, either, as I recall. Is the tension between Henry and Mike foreshadowing of the future? I think so. In other words, "It's on!"


Best Lines of the Week:
(Katie breaks the news to Mike that Henry convinced her to let Maddie stay at her house.)
Henry: "Why do you let him work you like that?"
Katie: "He didn't. He said some very true things."
Mike: "Henry? Henry Coleman said some true things?"


(Henry tries to get Maddie off the computer, so they can finish packing to leave.)
Henry: "We're almost out the door, so quit blogging and let's get a move on."
Maddie: "One second. My loyal readers want to read when I'm evicted and sent home in disgrace."
Henry: "That's just what I need Madeline. I need a bunch of teenage girls mocking my troubles. Been there, done that."


(Gwen wants to know where her non-working mother got thousands of dollars.)
Iris: "I have been stashing the money little by little and putting it in an account for when I retire."
Gwen: "You need to work before you can retire."


Reader Spotlight:
(From Two Scoops Liz.)
"Lilly and her sister should let Lucinda alone. Lucinda is the one with cancer, and she is the one suffering with chemo treatment so she should be allowed to use whatever she feels is working for her. Right or wrong, it is her life."

That's all for now Scoopers! See ya next time.
Jennifer Biller


Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of soapcentral.com or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen, what has happened, and to take a look at the logistics of it all. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same view point.



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